Youthful laughter and chatter rang through the Robert Crown Community Center. A group of girls, ages 8 to 14, gathered in a circle and began to chant their motto in unison.
“Always remember you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem and smarter than you think,” they recited.
Every other Tuesday, Armor Down Girls, a girls’ empowerment group, meets to discuss books with female protagonists, listen to female community leaders, learn about women’s history and engage in confidence-building exercises.
“I wanted to provide a safe space for girls to arm themselves, from head to toe, with confidence,” said Felisha Parsons, founder and director of Armor Down Girls.
Parsons, a long-time educator in Evanston-Skokie School District 65, noticed declining confidence levels in elementary school girls in her classroom after returning from a sabbatical in 2015. This trend, however, is not exclusive to Evanston – a 2018 survey conducted by Ypulse and the Confidence Code for Girls found confidence levels decreased by 30% in girls between the ages of 8 and 14, during the transition between childhood and adolescence. As women’s rights seemingly regress and digital media amplify self-awareness, “arming” girls with confidence is important for their current and future well-being, empowering them to be the next generation of leaders and continue the fight.
“On the outset of puberty, across all demographics, girls’ self-esteem drops,” licensed counselor Dan Gill said.
While hormonal and biological changes during puberty can lower self-esteem, Gill said girls also begin to realize the societal expectations placed upon them. Especially in the digital age, social media further exacerbates the problem.
“There are a lot of negative influences on social media,” licensed marriage and family therapist Ajit Samudra said. “People [are] very critical of how people look, how people present and what people’s identities are.”
To combat low self-esteem, Parsons picked books with female characters to read with her girls.
“[Girls] can empathize with the characters and put themselves in the shoes of the character,” Parsons, who taught from 1993 to 2018, said. “But the cornerstone is always confidence.”
Stella Diaz Never Gives Up, one of the chosen books, features a bilingual Mexican-American girl who struggles with shyness. The narrative draws inspiration from author Angela Dominguez’s childhood as an immigrant, navigating a language barrier and low self-esteem. On author visits, Dominguez said she noticed kids, who rarely raised their hands in class, speak up because they felt seen.
“Having books with kids that looked like me, or had my shared experiences, would have been such a confidence booster,” Dominguez said. “If you see yourself in a book, or start having conversations because of this book, you realize that you’re not alone in that experience.”
In addition to reading, Parsons invites female community leaders to share their stories. Taisa Capone, the mother of fourth grader Madison, recalled Madison’s excitement after she met Parson’s sister Monique, president of McGaw YMCA in Evanston.
“[Madison] came home and she was like, ‘We had a boss lady come in and she’s a woman,’” Capone said. “The guest speakers and the books [Armor Down Girls] read are molding [my daughter’s] confidence.”
Madison found herself applying her new skills in cheer practice.
“I didn’t know the dance, but I kept practicing and practicing until I got it,” Madison said. “Armor Down Girls taught me that.”
Looking forward, Parsons hopes to deepen her impact by increasing participants and developing a program in the Chicago Public Schools, readying more girls for the fight against low self-esteem.
“Even when [the girls] leave [Armor Down Girls], they’ll always remember [they] were a part of this,” Parsons said.
To the girls at the gathering, Parsons said, “Now go out and be great and do what you wanna do. Follow your passion and don’t let anybody stop you.”
