Karen Wylie did not expect her husband to die. 

But in the early morning of Feb. 22, Michael Wylie, 80, suffering from blockages in his intestines, passed away. The beloved mechanic and Evanston Township High School teacher chose pain medication over surgery. His wife and his stepdaughter held Michael Wylie until his last breath. 

“The main doctor came and was hugging me, and she was sobbing,” Karen Wylie said. “She was saying this was really beautiful, like just to listen to him and let him go.”

Evanston ranked No. 13 in a recent list of best small and midsize cities, according to Livability, a media and content marketing company. Is the city—with two hospitals, three funeral homes and one cemetery for its 76,000 residents— also a good final resting place?

“When you’re talking about, ‘Is Evanston a good place to die,’ Well, what is a good death?” said Lori Hatton, Evanston’s only full-time death doula, who provides emotional, spiritual and physical support and educational guidance to dying patients and their families. Specifically, she helps in advanced planning, where people choose their health care proxy in case they are unable to make medical decisions for themselves.

In 2023, after the deaths of her father and golden retriever, Hatton founded Nightingale Crossings to make people physically comfortable and minimize their suffering, to help with advance planning, to resolve emotional burdens and to address fears. 

“A bad death is remembered,” Hatton said. “A good death is one where the people know what their choices are, and it’s been written down, ideally, and it’s been discussed with the family members, so they’re honoring it.”

Insurance does not cover death doula services, which in the Chicago area average about $100 per hour. But for patients facing life expectancy of six months or less, the federal government pays for hospice care through the Medicare Hospice Benefit. Dr. Joshua Hauser, a professor at the Northwestern Feinberg School of Medicine who specializes in internal medicine and palliative care and works with patients facing the end of their lives, said people want company on their deathbed.

“Whether that’s surrounded by friends or family or healthcare providers, or any combination of those, I think [loneliness is] what people are most afraid of and most want to fight against,” Hauser said.

Both the St. Francis Hospital and Evanston Hospital offer spiritual services. Elizabeth Harding, a part-time palliative care chaplain at the University of Illinois Hospital in Chicago, talks to patients battling theological questions of “existential despair.” 

“In order to have a good death, ideally the spiritual care department, or the pastoral care team or whoever is providing that work, would allow and create a space for people to have those conversations, so that their spirit is at rest,” Harding said.

People nearing the end of their lives may look for religious guidance, and Evanston, with at least 50 churches, synagogues, mosques and temples, makes it easily accessible. 

“Evanston is a place where community is really important, and faith communities are really central and interwoven into the life of the wider community,” said Eileen Wiviott, senior minister at the Unitarian Church of Evanston. “In that way I think that Evanston could be considered a great place to not only live but to depart, to end this life in a faithful and loving and supported way.”

Andrea London, a rabbi at the Beth Emet Synagogue who has officiated hundreds of funerals over the past three decades, said people find support in the rituals around death and Judaism. 

“Funerals are some of the best things that we do,” London said. “Now, why would one say that? It’s because we can really be a comforting presence in people’s lives. I give people the permission to be where they are, and that’s a gift to people.”

Funeral director Allen Jordan, who has worked at Haliburton Funeral Chapel for 39 years, loves his job and describes it as a “ministry.”

“I’m doing something that the families can’t do themselves and doing something that God can’t come down here,” Jordan said. “I look at myself as a medium between heaven and earth.” 

The Calvary Catholic Cemetery is the only burial space in Evanston, so most of Jordan’s clients bury caskets at Sunset Memorial Lawns in Northbrook. After serving thousands of families, he said the best place to die is at home surrounded by loved ones.

Is Evanston a good place to die? The hospital care is adequate. The spiritual aspect meets, if not exceeds, the mark. Most importantly, the city features a tight-knit support system. 

“The Evanston community is wonderful,” said Karen Wylie, retired public school teacher and widow to Michael Wylie.