An image of Wille the Wildcat holding a basketball

Since its inception, Hangover has provided sage wisdom to the student body. In a generous effort to connect with our avid readers, we opened up a forum for Hangover fans to write in with their most pressing questions so that we could dispense some of our boundless knowledge.

Dear Hangover, Dear Hangover,

It's almost summer, and I still don't have an internship! PLEASE help me figure out what I should do. I'm an econ major with a marketing certificate, but nowhere I applied to has responded!

An image of a briefcase

So you need an internship, huh? Well, lucky for you, I happen to be a marketing expert and extremely qualified business consultant. My experience has included multiple positions at major corporations from Silicon Valley to Hong Kong. I speak seven languages (including Latin) and have patented more than 20 products. My most recent product, the automatic peanut butter sandwich decruster, secured nine different awards, including first place at the Washington Middle School Science Fair. My TEDx talk on the economy of the Great Barrier Reef received a standing ovation. Anyway, looks like I've hit my word limit. Hope this helps!

- Tabor Brewster - Tabor Brewster
Dear Hangover, Dear Hangover,

I looked at my results, and AND is literally in my DNA! What can I do to make my overworked schedule everyone else's problem?

You just have so much on your plate, I get it. Here's some advice:

An image of DNA - Lauren Cohn - Lauren Cohn
Dear Hangover, Dear Hangover,

My dorm has a spider problem, but I'm vegan. How can I get rid of them while still being woke about animal rights?

Hi gorgeous, I totally feel your pain. Spiders are more populous at this school than nepotism babies. Here are a few ways to get rid of them without dirtying one of your vegan leather sandals:

An image of a spider - Julia Lucas - Julia Lucas
Dear Hangover, Dear Hangover,

I've had three coats stolen from Reza's. My parents have had to buy four Canada Goose jackets, and I'm worried about losing the next one. What can I do to keep my coat?

Many students, including yours truly, have been victims of Reza's coat thieves. Here are some simple things you can do to keep your coat at the club:

An image of a Canada Goose coat - Jamie Dickman - Jamie Dickman


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